Don't end your life!

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the focus

To try and prevent as many people ending their lives as possible.

With regular mental and physical self care and support from fellow humans, we can be stronger together.

The better mentally and physically conditioned we are, the better prepared we are for storms.

I’m not a qualified medical practitioner, but I AM a guy who’s been around the block a few times, lived it, breathed it and survived it. These are just some ideas and examples of what myself and others have said to ourselves to stick around in this life for so long that hopefully might help other people.

Maybe they will help, maybe the reverse but be responsible and use at your own discretion as each person and situation are different.


Thoughts of wanting to hurt ourselves are normally nothing to worry about, they come and go in our life randomly or for various reasons and it’s good to just recognise the feelings and observe what’s going on internally with us. If these are regular thoughts and you are wanting to hurt yourself – please contact your local emergency services and trusted friends and family.

Not today!

If you or somebody else feel as if you want to take your own life, what are some things you can do or say to get out of that mindset?

What can I smell, touch, taste, hear and see right now, in this moment, be as descriptive as possible. Tell me a story of what all 5 of my senses are telling me in my physical body right now, at this very moment (ignoring the mind). Is the air on your hands hot or cold? How much? What does the air smell like? Do you like it? Is it hot or cold on your nostrils? Etc.

Say to myself, “I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Maybe some more s**t will happen but maybe not and something good might happen. Anything could happen tomorrow and if I’m not even giving it a chance to happen because I’m not alive to see it, I’ll never know.” Not today”, see how I feel tomorrow. As the Spanish say, Manyana, manyana, manyana! (Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow).

Put my arms around myself and hold tight. Since I was hurt, that little boy/girl inside of me has been asking you all this time for a hug and now you’re still so adamant about not giving them a hug that you would rather kill yourself than comfort and care for the little you who needed you all this time when no one else was there. You’re here now and that little boy/girl still loves you and is still waiting for that hug.

Go for a coffee, beer, joint, chill and write down all my problems to then figure out ways how to improve my situation.

Remember it’s not just me in my world – There are people who love me, there are people I love who will never be able to experience each other anymore, even people we haven’t yet met.

I will never feel what ‘being loved’ or ‘to love’ feels like again.

There are too many sacrifices I’m making by doing this, such as: I will never see the sun rise or set again. I will never experience the warmth of the sun on my skin. I will never smell the air before it rains. I will never hear the birds sing. I will never play with any animals and they will never feel the warmth of my love. I will never smell the grass of the 1st spring morning. I will never meet a woman who I can fall deeply in love with and have a family of my own and continue the bloodline.

I will never speak to or interact with another human being again and nobody will experience the wonderful qualities, wisdom and experience I can give again.

Journal my thoughts and feelings

Write a letter to the person/thing that makes me feel upset, once you’ve written it, burn it in a ceremony and forget about it.

A death affects 9 people on average and someone killing themselves affects 15 people on average. You are directly hurting 15 people on average by following through with this.

There are so many years left in my life and there are so many opportunities to change the course of my life and improve it step by step.

I have the power and control over how my mind reacts to my thoughts from my mind being on autopilot and I won’t let my body be controlled by my mind on glitching out. I need to be aware of the disruptive thoughts as soon as possible to nip them in the bud and reject them.

There are 2 sets of problems, the ones we can do something about and the ones we can’t do anything about. For the ones we can’t do anything about, we must proactively defend and brace for impact with ideally minimal damage. The ones we can do something about, we must attack relentlessly with all our strength and not stop until the problem is defeated/solved/overcome.

If I don’t want to help myself, maybe I can help other people out of their holes and give back.

I am at rock bottom now my friend, the only way is up and I can make my life better bit by bit.

The traumas that have happened to me are not who I am and don’t define who I am as a person.

The depression is guiding me away from the harm in my past to not make the same mistakes again and the anxiety is guiding me on what I need to be aware of in the future.

Am I sure I want to do this? If I am certain I want to go ahead with this – I should wait 1 year and then reconsider as it is permanent. Depression is like a storm cloud that comes and goes, although it lingers longer than we may want – it will be on its way eventually and it’s very possible to help it move quicker with self-love and kindness.

Journal my thoughts, feelings and emotions until there’s nothing left in my brain and it’s empty.

The traumas that I have experienced guide me towards a better way to do things in future and also show me what I need to heal.

Write out the problems. Can they be figured out? The ones that can’t – forget them and move on. Solve the problems that can be solved.

There’s no way the world is going to be better off without me in it as I have the power to make changes now to improve my life and other people’s lives, making the world a bit of a better place.

Grab something that brings comfort e.g. Blanket or teddy bear as a child, or wear a t-shirt or something physical of significance.

Remind yourself it’s OK and it can’t get worse than this. This is the end of the line and I can and will improve my life and those around me.

You’re worth more than getting rid of all the accumulated ‘you’, that you’ve built from the ground up all this time. You have qualities and good inside of you, don’t waste them.

We have all failed and it’s OK, we learn and improve, and no success is built without these failures. It’s the relentless kicking in the door of opportunity to eventually open it if there isn’t a key! Be relentless. I believe in you.

I’ll bet you can help improve someone else’s life if you don’t want to improve your own. With your experience, there are ways to help others out. You have so much knowledge and wisdom to help others who are also in the same position. Can you think of someone in your life who you can help with your experience in life?

It’s not just you that’s leaving us behind, maybe your family or friends would do the same because they can’t handle the loss of you.

Please see the bigger picture brother/sister – There are people who need you. Whether it’s people who rely on you for their own survival or whether it’s the love they have for you or whether you have yet to meet these people to transform your or their life – You are wanted, loved and needed.

You can make a difference alive, dead, you’ll make no difference and you’ll be forgotten about in a year. How about you stick around and we make a plan of where you want to make a difference and let’s make that difference! 

What’s your purpose/ your meaning in life? What do you enjoy? What are you good at?

Maybe be a mascot for the love you missed or the pain you felt.

Champion the pain caused and help save others from a similar fate.

This is just a rough patch, we can make it through the other side. Like a cloud, some are lighter, some darker, some breeze over quickly and some linger for a while.

You are not a burden by speaking to people for support. The worst would be if you never tried and kept trying and you left the world in such a manner. They weren’t even given opportunities to help you. They will never feel better without you. They won’t find their peace and they will see the same answer in killing themselves that you did so 1 death becomes multiple. We are here for you.

There are a lot of services available that can help you get through this rough patch let’s find some.

You’re worth more than getting rid of.

All the accumulated you that you’ve built from the ground up all this time is in the past and doesn’t exist, what matters is what you can do going forward.